job interviewer: so…tell me a little about yourself :)
me: sure. i’m a virgo, INTJ, i love tank tops oh my god did you see the Anaconda video? that changed my life!
interviewer: bitch me too! the fuck. you got the job
Do the birds and bees ever hang out or do they just fuck every time?
when rape is the girls fault
- when she is the rapist
when rape is the guys fault
- when he is the rapist
ppl who randomly message u on the tumble are the best kind of ppl even if they’re just bein all like ‘hello!’ because its like omg hi hello person wow someones talking to me this is the best day ever
i get like 10 hellos a day because of this post
No one ever messages me. 😒
I got seven hellos & hi’s the last time i reblogged this
girl: so u wanna fuck with the lights on or off bae?
me: *thinks about the electricity bill*
me: in the dark ;)
last night i dreamed that scientists used a really bad picture of me to prove humans are closely related to goats and i was so insulted i woke up